I swear! It wasn't me! I was framed! Okay. . .so maybe I did it. . .but it wasn't by my own choice!!! Mastah made me do it! She said, "Minion, I want you to do THIS!!" she said! I tried to reason with her, but Mastah's recently gone insane and is now an Insane Mastah Genius!! I tried to resist, but her genius will was too insane and diabolical for a little minion like myself! . . . .No, that message wasn't from her. . . .No, I don't know who sent it, they said to burn it as soon as I read it so I did (with much burning and flaming! muahahahahaa!). . . .It had to be from Mastah! I know it was from Mastah! Who else would come up with a devious scheme and inform me with a hand-written message on a piece of parchment with a wax seal bearing the Jolly Roger?! . . . .You baboon! The Dread Pirate Julianna wouldn't have sent that to me! She wouldn't be able to! She's currently sacking villages and ports in the Caribbean sea! . . . .What's this? The Elvish Pirate Gypsy may have slunked into her house, written a message, sealed it with the Dread Pirate's seal, and then sent it to me knowing I would never suspect her? You normal person lacking imagination! The Elvish Pirate Gyspy wouldn't do that! She's currently on the trail of the Bamboozling Harmdinger! . . . .What do you mean she's sitting comfortably at home? She is not! She's in the deepest mountain peak in the highest jungles looking for the harmdinger! . . .You beg to differ do you! I know! She sent me this cursed voodoo doll from a tribal chief she befriended! Besides, her elvish third wouldn't allow such a thing! . . . .what do you mean her elvish third could be distracted, she's one-third elvish!! Elves are not easily distracted! . . . . You and your "I beg to differ"s! I'll show you differs! Take THAT! And THAT!!
*scuffles with invisible opponent for a couple of hours*
Say Uncle! Say Uncle! . . . .Not Aunty, you twit!!
*more fighting. Knocks over a plant*
Oh, now you've done it! That was Mastah's favorite plant!
*punching, kicking, biting, twisting, wrestling, and another two hours later. . . .*
Yeah! That's right! Leave! Leave and go tattle tell to the police! They can't catch me! I'm a nomad and I serve no one but the Insane Mastah Genius!
Where's a cookie. I need a cookie. . . .I like the cookie. . . .
*munches*
3 comments:
*stares* and we thought we were stranges precious...the white face must have gone to her head...
*chokes on her own root beer in a wild fit of laughter*
Wow. Awesome. I think I want to hang out with you people when I visit Utah.
*shakes head* Perhaps it's time to give my minions/jesters/pirates a break. They've all gotten a tad loony lately...
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